compliments.

I'm so confused
and frustrated
I'm just being nice
I'm being a decent human being
giving you a compliment or two
showing you that
I always see the best in you

but no, it's too far
too many connotations
it's flirting
definitely flirting
she wants more
you want more
she wants you
what the fuck do you want
make your mind up
sort your life out
don't lead her astray
to places she'll regret
you'll regret
just stop
calm down
lay off
you're dragging her in
stop it
stop it now
you're hurting her
just leave.

just a compliment
i swear,
not charming,
not flirting,
not sweet-talking
i'm just
being
fucking
nice
why isn't that
okay these days

why do we live
in such a shattered
broken glass society
we're all terrified
of cutting ourselves
snagging flesh
on the judgments of others
so afraid,
that a compliment
a gentle word
something that, somehow
draws a smile
suddenly that's too much
it means such a lot
and we magnify
and marinate
and swill it
round and round
until it expands with pressure

just accept it for what it was.
can't i just be nice anymore?

empty shell.

Do you ever just feel like
The weight, of everything,
Is crushing you
Right in front of people
As you walk, sit, talk
There's a darkness
Trying to stamp you out
Out of existence
Wrench you from this world
Drag you under
Until there's nothing left of you
Just an empty shell
And still, you'd keep on
Walking, sitting, talking
And no-one would know
No-one would know.

I am nothing without you 

A fucking waste of space

Why am I alive

I want it all to stop