cold, blank, silent; i try not to falter in front of you. how much things have changed.
i want you to know what's going on in my mind. i want you to see how i'm breaking into pieces inside. but i can't let you through, because i don't want to need you again. despite what i said, you have become like everyone else, stuck behind the dam that prevents me from pouring out my soul.
i can't physically speak. i flick through the usual excuses, realise that they have no effect on your merciless attacks, and just say nothing. bile in my throat, the barricade rises, stopping the flow of words. the flow of tears.
it takes weeks, months, years to build up trust.
only seconds, minutes, hours to knock it down.
2 comments:
Love this, great writing. It was palpable, I could feel my throat close up. Guess we all have experience feeling voiceless.
thankyou. yes, i guess we do, which is why i love blogging so much - i don't need a voice to speak out.
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